The Good Old days

I've found myself reminiscing a lot lately.  Abe and I have been together for almost 10 years.  We met when he was 18 and I was 19.  We started dating when I was 20 and we've been together ever since.  When I think about how young we were I wonder how I would feel if Farrah chose the same path.  It makes me uneasy to think about her getting married at 23 but I also know that it was right for us so if she makes that choice I know it will be what's best for her. Here we are as babies in college (yes we were over 21.)  I think my husband hasn't aged a bit.  In fact he still has that shirt :)

 

I've been thinking a lot about the carefreeness of those days.  I don't want to say that life was easier, but it was certainly a lot more simple.  Being in the line of work I'm in, I get to talk to lots of different people from lots of different walks of life and one thing I hear from the college crowd a lot is "I'm just so busy, I don't have time for (xyz.)"  I have to bite my tongue every time because inside all I'm thinking is "Are you kidding me?  This is probably the most time you will ever have until you retire so soak it up now kid!"  And then I start feeling really old.

But I think the same sentiment applies to us all.  We all get caught up in the act of being busy.  We're all so busy being busy and it's the first thing we give as an excuse for something we want to get out of.  But what I've learned in my almost 30 years on earth is that if something is important to you, you'll find a way to make it work.  Period.  End of story.  It's one thing to say that you're choosing  not to do something because it doesn't align with your values at this time, but I'm amazed at how many people use the "I'm too busy" excuse for something that could enhance their lives.  Going back to school, eating healthier, weekly date nights, whatever it may be.  My friends, time is not promised.  Make time for things that make your life better.  

Off my soapbox on that.  Back to the good old days.  I've been revisiting fond memories of our early days together.  Walks on the beach in Santa Barbara whenever we wanted, unlimited time together, our tiny studio apartment, the hodge podge of hand me down furniture.  Actually we still have a lot of that furniture so scratch that one.  Would I want to give up everything I have now to go back to that?  Absolutely not.  We are blessed beyond measure.  But when I think of those days, I am reminded that we really have been through so much together.  Those 20 year olds probably had no idea what was in store for them.  The pure joy, and the absolute sorrow.  I believe God gave me him and God gave me Farrah to make it through these last several months.  I have no doubt in my mind this wouldn't work if I had to do this with anyone else.   

I'm sure most couples that have been together longer than we have may think 9+ years is nothing, but when I think about all that has happened in these 9 short years, I'm sure it's more than most have to endure in an entire lifetime.  In one of my therapy sessions the therapist said that there was a study done on couples that had been married a long time compared to those that had been divorced.  The couples that stayed together didn't have any less life stressors.  They had just as many struggles with money, jobs, deaths, etc.  They did have better communication skills.  That is the reason why I know we're in it for a lifetime.