For this I prayed

Wow!  Over 6 months since my last post.  I think that may be a personal record for me.  I'm obviously not a professional blogger.  This is mostly an outlet for me as well as a way for long distance family and friends to keep up with all things Naldjian.  I haven't written lately because I simply haven't been inspired to write.  Don't get me wrong, our lives are far from boring.  We've been busy this summer and are gearing up for Farrah to start the first grade in just a couple weeks.  Evan is almost 21 months (I know I know... the months thing is irritating to people but he just doesn't seem to fit the one year old category), and man, has this past week been a challenge.  I feel like my house has been filled with a permanent sound of whining.  Am I so far removed from when Farrah was in this stage?  Was it ever this bad with her?  It's possible.  I just don't remember.
He has no idea what he wants.  Or maybe he does and I'm just not understanding which is why he feels the need to scrunch up his face, let out the whining noise that never seems to end and just walk around the house making sure everyone knows how mad he is.  He's started hitting too which has made for some interesting apology sessions to unsuspecting toddlers' parents during playdates.  I swear he's a great kid he's just kind of a pint sized jerk right now.
In these moments it's easy for me to lose my patience.  I inherited my dad's short temper.  Long lines?  Can't deal.  Calling a customer service line and being on hold for an hour?  I lose it. Yes it's different when it's your child, but also, not really.  It's hard to keep your cool when your kid decides the dinner he loved yesterday is now his least favorite thing in the world and it would be better suited on the carpet than on his high chair tray. Fellow parents, hear me when I say I know how hard this is.  But I keep coming back to the fact that this is what I prayed for.  I wanted every part of being a parent to a little life again after we lost Kellen.  The sleepless nights, the spit up, even the colic.  And Evan delivered on all of those!  Imagine that!  So now we're here, navigating waters we never got to with Kellen.  And it's joyous.  Really though.  I have to remind myself of that when I want to pull out my hair because he JUST.WON'T.LAY.STILL so I can change his diaper.  Yes, even I, the mom who should find joy in every moment automatically after loss has to remind herself that this IS a blessing.  I get to experience something many people wish they could and, for that, I am grateful.
So carry on, toddler parents!  I salute you.  I promise I'll believe you when you say how sweet your kid is even when they're screaming on the floor at Target.  Find the joy.  It's a blessing.

 This is my "why the heck are you not asleep?" face

Proof he still has cute moments.  His "cheese!" face.